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The Year I Crucified Our Christmas Tree

Posted on December 7, 2014 by queenbookworm

It was the best of times … Christmastime with our four kids, my husband, the dog and cat and our own business.

It was the worst of times… Christmastime with our four kids, my husband, the dog & cat and our own business.

Our daughter was selling Christmas trees as a fund-raiser for her school so we bought a wildly expensive variety of tree I’ve never seen before – long, skinny needles and floppy limbs. I was a little peeved because we couldn’t really afford the expensive tree and per normal, the kids were excited to decorate the tree until the lights were strung and the hot chocolate was gone. Then I found myself alone hanging the ornaments on individual branches and cherishing the memories they evoked. It took me hours to display each gem in the most aesthetically pleasing way, then I had to clear up the boxes, tissue paper, dirty mugs and the rest of the mess and store everything away so I could reverse the process in about three weeks.

We ran our own business which means we pretty much worked 24/7. So I was tired and grumpy when I got up the next morning and found about half the ornaments on the ground with the cat looking sheepish. This time it wasn’t really her fault but she has a guilty conscience and looks sheepish a lot. I realized that the ornaments were sliding off the long needles so with no helpful elves around (again), I wired each ornament securely to its limb then went shopping for gifts and groceries, I shipped packages, did laundry, cleaned the bathrooms – you know the drill if you’re a working mom, and I got home just in time to prepare dinner.

Attempting to de-stress with a glass of wine after experiencing all the Christmas throngs and good cheer at the mall, I was working at the stove when there was a thump, a crash of breaking glass, barking, meowing & nervous laughter from the living room. You guessed it, the tree was on the ground amid broken ornaments and the kids were sidling toward the door where the dog and cat were vying with each other and the kids to exit the room.

I was calm. Mayhap it was the wine. Perchance I was on my second glass of wine.

I found the largest nail in my husband’s toolbox and his hammer. I called the biggest kid in to hold the tree straight while I shoved it into the corner, grabbed the two largest branches in the back and nailed them to the wall. I picked up the unbroken ornaments and forced them into my children’s hands and told them to do whatever they wanted with them. The youngest had the temerity to say, “Daddy’s not going to like that”.

I fed the kids, finished my wine and went to bed.

When I got up to make coffee the next morning, the tree was laying on the floor; the large nail having split the branches. Fortunately, the tree was located near the sliding glass doors to the back yard. I opened the doors, removed the star from the top of the tree so I could get a good grip and dragged that sorry-ass tree into the back yard. I made my coffee, added a nice big splash of Kahlua and listened to soothing Christmas music until my family arose.

After my second cup of coffee I was smiling serenely when the kids looked outside and saw their Christmas tree glistening in the morning sun. They didn’t say a word.

“Why is there a spike in the wall?” asked my husband.

Merry Christmas.

Categories: Family, Humor, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: Christmas trees, tree decorating | Leave a comment

Grandma Bernstein’s Chicken Noodle Soup

Posted on December 4, 2014 by queenbookworm

I wish I’d known my Grandma Bernstein, I would have loved her. She was from Russia and raised four children alone on Miami Beach by opening and running Jewish restaurants and delis on South Beach in the 1930s and 1940s. Three generations of Bernstein women lived and worked together providing some of the most popular meals served in Miami Beach during those decades. My grandma, her daughter Eva, my mother Rose and Eva’s daughter Marilyn. Rose met and fell in love with my Russian father and the whole group pitched in to teach him the restaurant business as well as how to speak and write in English. He became a successful and popular restauranteur opening several restaurants of his own, Al’s Sandwich Shop, Al Nemets’ Restaurant and Grill in Miami Beach and Chicago.

OK – back to the chicken soup. When I got sick as a kid we always had Grandma’s legendary chicken noodle soup or Jewish penicillin. It never failed! When I had my own family, who had time to make home-made soup when you could open a can of Campbells or Mrs. Grass’ chicken soup? Then when my mother was dying and I had pneumonia, my brother made a pot of Grandma’s soup and I learned how incredibly easy it is to make this wonderful, golden, magic elixir.

Find a nice plump, fatty chicken. You’ll also need an onion, a few carrots, a few stalks of celery and egg noodles and most important, a bunch of fresh dill. You can actually use any type of pasta but I love broad egg noodles. USE ONLY FRESH INGREDIENTS! Adjust the vegetables, if you like more carrots then celery or more onion than celery, go ahead. No one cares. But don’t take any shortcuts or the magic won’t work.

Get out your soup pot and lay the whole rinsed chicken in the bottom and add water to about an inch above the chicken. Let the bird simmer for about an hour, depending on the size of the chicken. You don’t want to overcook it or the meat will be dry. It is done when you poke it with a fork and the juice runs clear. It will also be almost falling off the bone. While the chicken cooks, clean and cut up your carrots and celery. I French slice nice big chunks and just quarter the onion. Rinse the dill, get rid of the stems and chop the rest.

When the chicken is done remove it from the broth and let it cool in a bowl or platter. De-bone it when it cools. You may want to add some bouillion cubes to the broth if it doesn’t taste “chickeny” enough. Now add the carrots, celery, onion and dill to the broth and simmer until the veggies are done — firm, not mushy. Add salt and pepper to taste. Don’t skimp on the salt. The noodles can be added to the broth during the last 10 minutes of cooking or you can cook them separately and add them to the individual bowls as you serve. Some (crazy) people don’t like noodles or they’re gluten-free or carbohydrate intolerant. Did I get all the buzz words in there? Ladle out a bowl of broth, vegetables & noodles and put a nice piece of chicken on top.

Don’t worry about fat, calories or carbohydrates, just enjoy and feel well!

p.s. The magic ingredients are the chicken fat and the dill!

p.p.s. Wait til I tell you about Grandma’s Russian Cabbage Soup, it’s to die for!

Categories: Family, Food, Health, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: chicken noodle soup, Jewish chicken noodle soup, Jewish penicillin, Miami Beach, mid-century recipe, Russian recipes, South Beach | 10 Comments

Flip Flops, Snowboots and Mucinex – These are a Few of My Favorite Things

Posted on December 4, 2014 by queenbookworm

When we left our home in Florida the day before Thanksgiving it was 89 degrees and sunny. We closed up the house, turned the air-conditioner to 80 and made sure the pool was clean & shocked then jumped in the car and drove 550 miles to Atlanta to have Thanksgiving with our daughter’s family where we picked up the flu before jumping in the car to drive the last 750 miles to our cottage in Tawas, Michigan.

Flip flops and Go Walks

So I wore my flip flops from Florida to Atlanta, then as my feet got cold, I switched to my enclosed Go Walks by Skechers. If you don’t have a pair of Go Walks for everyday use, do yourself a favor and buy some. They’re like walking on air. As we got farther north I added a pair of socks with my Go Walks and started coughing & sneezing. We stopped early in Kentucky because I was such a hot mess and was begging for Mucinex and Delsym cough medicine. So,there’s three recommendations in one paragraph — Go Walks for your feet, Mucinex for your nose and Delsym for your cough. Isn’t there an old joke about being built backwards, “my feet smell and my nose runs”?

By the time we got to our cottage in Tawas, Michigan we were both hacking & snorting & shivering & feverish and spent the first two days doing the flu shuffle …. from the bed to the chair in front of the fireplace to the sofa to the bathroom & back to bed. My ensemble was flannel pajamas and woolen socks.

Water proof snow boots and leather hiking boots

Today I finally was well enough to go outside and walk down to our little beach on Tawas Bay on Lake Huron. I wore my waterproof boots because it snowed yesterday. I saw raccoon and deer tracks in the snow and the frozen sand, the sun was shining in a blue sky and you’d never know it was 19 degrees.

So that’s my 1,300 mile footwear travelogue. I enjoyed every step.

Our little beach on Tawas Bay, Lake Huron

Categories: Family, Health, Life, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: Delsym, flip flops, Go Walk, Lake Huron, Mucinex, snow boots, Tawas Bay, Tawas MI | Leave a comment

Winter Wonderland or the 9th Circle of Hell?

Posted on November 27, 2014 by queenbookworm

Dante’s Ninth Circle of Hell – a lake of ice

My winter wonderland

When I moved from Florida to Ohio as a young bride I had no concept of “cold”.

I believed:

That snow is pretty, white and fluffy – when in fact snow is also wet, cold, slushy & gets dirty
That winter fashions in magazines are beautiful leather, wool, plaids, boots, sweaters, overcoats, scarves, socks & boots – when in fact, by the time I bundled up to be warm enough to survive, I couldn’t fit behind the steering wheel of my VW Beetle;
That ice filigreed trees, snow-covered walks, icicles, frozen lakes and rivers are picturesque – when in fact I slid on the ice and fell on my ass every time I walked out the front door;
That the cold air is crisp and invigorating – when in fact it burns your skin, covers your face in snot, chaps your lips and generally makes you look ugly;
That children are adorable in their snowshoes and mittens – when in fact, by the time you get them stuffed into their snow pants, zippered into their winter jackets and shoved into their boots and mittens, they have to pee;
That our home would look like a Currier and Ives print with sunny blue skies and pristine snowfall – when in fact, after Christmas there are still three months of dark, dreary days until Spring.

I spent 11 winters dreaming of moving home to Florida and have spent the past 30 years enjoying sunny, warm winters. Why am I now planning to spend a month between Thanksgiving and Christmas in the northern woods of Michigan and hoping for snow?

I’m retired and have a cute little cottage on the shores of Lake Huron where I can retreat and do nothing but the things I want, no responsibilities or schedules. If it’s bright and sunny maybe we’ll go snowshoeing; if it’s miserable maybe I’ll set up my sewing machine in the kitchen & quilt or maybe I’ll sit in front of the fireplace and read until I get tired enough to shift to the sofa for a nap. On clear days we’ll put on our weatherproof boots and walk along the shore of the lake taking pictures of the frozen fractals.

The difference is having to go out in the snow and cold vs wanting to play outdoors in the snow and cold.

I can’t wait.

Heaven or hell … I choose heaven.

Categories: Family, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: 9th circle of hell, Dante, fireplace, Florida, ice, Michigan, quilting, sleet, snow, winter, winter wonderland | Leave a comment

OMG! DI Justin Ripley was killed in “Luther” & I Want to Change the Ending …

Posted on November 18, 2014 by queenbookworm

Idris Elba as DCI John Luther

I’m sure you already knew … but I just finished watching Season 2 of “Luther”, the best British psychological crime drama I’ve seen on TV. The suspense is so unsettling that a portion of each episode is viewed through my partially covered eyes or by watching my husband’s face and asking him to tell me what happened. Even he jumps occasionally. I did not believe that the bad guy, a vigilante, would shoot Ripley since Justin Ripley was the most loyal, brave, honest, proud “copper” on the show and the only true friend to Luther. However, a shotgun blast to the chest ended all that. There was no hope of heroic medical intervention, that it was a bad dream or any of the other techniques used to assure our favorite characters survive certain death. Luther’s anguish – when he laid down beside his dead friend – finished me off. I’ve been dwelling on Ripley’s death thinking that he should have backed off and not confronted the killer.

DI Justin Ripley R.I.P.

Do you ever do that … wish that you could change the ending of a story? I’ve read “Rebecca” by Daphne du Maurier and “Jane Eyre” by Charlotte Bronte again and again trying to tell the heroines to grow a backbone and claim their loves. I talk out loud to many of Charles Dickens’ characters attempting to tell them who to trust and I won’t even tell you about my conversations with Stephen King’s victims. There would be far fewer casualties if they would listen when I warn them not to open a certain door, or go down the basement stairs, or turn down a dark alley. I try, but no one listens.

So, I will watch the final season (Season 3) of “Luther” and hope that he straightens out his personal life, triumphs over the internal police investigation, rids London of more murderous psychos, and re-establishes his strange and dangerous relationship with Alice. He will have to do it all without his faithful side-kick, Justin, which makes me sad.

Please don’t tell me the ending.

Categories: Family, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: Idris Elba, Jane Eyre, John Luther, Justin Ripley, Luther, Rebecca, Stephen King, suspense, tv dramas | Leave a comment

A Two Mile Walk in Paradise vs An Hour at the Gym

Posted on November 14, 2014 by queenbookworm

I can’t tell you how much $$ I’ve spent on gym memberships. I hated every minute I spent in them after being cooped up in an office for 8-10 hours. I am grateful that I can now walk or hike whenever and wherever I want in order to strengthen my body, mind and spirit. This is my little piece of Paradise where I walk for two miles, listen to music, Hay House Radio or just meditate on the beauty of the setting. The Peace River – how appropriate.

The Peace River, Charlotte Harbor, Florida

On the walking path to the first pier

Careful not to disturb the herons

Walking out to the second pier

Past the playground

It looked like rain for a few minutes

After my 2 mile walk I like to sit at a picnic bench with my morning smoothie and my book. Paradise!

For me there is something cathartic about walking near the water; the sound, the motion, the smell. This is just one of many paths I enjoy along the Peace River. I know how lucky I am to live in a climate where I can exercise outdoors almost year round. When we visit our cottage in Michigan I attempt to exercise outside — hiking, snowshoeing or cross-country skiing. Last Christmas I tried walking from our cottage to Lake Huron, about 100 yards, and almost wheezed up my brittle frozen sinuses and lungs – oops, it was minus 11 degrees, dumb Florida girl. So, how many calories are burned from shivering?

I took my 3-year old grandson snowshoeing last Christmas in a different sort of Paradise – the northern woods of Michigan.

Categories: Family, Health, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: Charlotte Harbor, exercise, Florida, Peace River, walking | Leave a comment

Sisters Road Trip – Last Stop Kayaking on the Rainbow River, Florida

Posted on November 10, 2014 by queenbookworm

We decided to take the road less traveled on our way back to Florida from Memphis. We wanted no interstates, only state and county roads meandering our way down to the west coast of Florida and south to the Rainbow Springs State Park in Dunnellon. The first night we ended up in Ozark, Alabama which quickly cured us of any romantic notions of fun-filled adventures on the byways of America. I apologize in advance to anyone from Ozark but we did not have a good experience. So what … we were on our way to beautiful Rainbow Springs.

We arrived in Dunnellon in the early afternoon and checked into a quaint little motel at the confluence of the Rainbow and Withlacoochee Rivers. We met a friend for dinner at Swampy’s, a restaurant with outdoor seating right on the Springs. Great food but bring your own mosquito spray if you want to sit outside. We did.

Swampy’s Bar & Grill

There wasn’t a cloud in the sky & the temperature was in the mid-70’s.

This trip down the Rainbow River was a present of beauty to my sister. I’d been down the River several times and had tried to describe the almost spiritual feeling of serenity and peace, but I needed to show her. She never kayaked and is not especially athletic or graceful (runs in the family), I was a little trepiditious taking her on a 2-3 hour paddle with no turning back. But she insisted she could do it and do it she did! Her reaction was everything I wished for … an audible gasp when the shuttle dropped us off at the launch site into the River.

My sister’s first time in a kayak

Rainbow River Canoe & Kayak

We rented a tandem kayak from Rainbow River Canoe & Kayak, parked our car and were shuttled upriver five miles where the owner helped us into the kayak and headed us in the right direction – downriver. The thing about the Rainbow River is that it is a constant 71 degrees year round and flows at the rate of one mile an hour. So if we did nothing but flounder, we would eventually float back to our car. Up to 500 million gallons of pure water flow from more than 100 spring vents ever day replenishing the river with crystal clear water. I assured my sister that there were no alligators or snakes in the river due to the cold temperature and she believed me.

Beware Alligators!

Paddling a kayak for 3 hours is thirsty work so after we returned our kayak we headed back to Swampy’s looking and smelling like swamp rats.

And that was the finale to our Sisters Road Trip 2014 … central Florida to Atlanta, to Nashville, to Memphis, to Dunnellon. Not only was it a chance for my sister and me to re-connect and visit some of our family, but it was an opportunity to share with her my philosophy of going, doing and exploring when the spirit moves you. We’re retired, our children are grown and there are no constraints, no boundaries, no schedules. It’s our turn to have fun and we did.

Categories: Family, Kayaking, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: Dunnellon FL, kayaking, Rainbow River Springs, Rainbow Springs State Park, Swampy's Bar & Grill, Withlacoochee | Leave a comment

I ran a marathon with my daughter … no training and my butt never left the couch!

Posted on November 9, 2014 by queenbookworm

The Savannah Rock n Roll Marathon

When Heidi called to tell me she’d be running the Savannah Rock ‘n Roll Marathon, she asked if I wanted to go with her. “Sure”, I laughed. But, I did. With the aid of wireless technology, I was able to sit on my couch while Heidi ran 26 miles and I ran with her through an internet-based GPS tracking system called Runner Tracker located on her shoe.

The short one (4'11") is my daughter with her good friend before the run.

The short one (4’11”) is my daughter Heidi, with her good friend Angela before the run.

This device activated a text message to me whenever she stepped on pre-positioned mats around the course and provided real time monitoring throughout the race.

The tracking device

So, I was with her when she started the race at 7:10:29 a.m. She crossed the 5K (3.1 Mile) at 7:39:25 a.m. with a time of 28:54. She crossed the 10K (6.2 Mile) at 8:09:56 a.m. with a time of 59.25 and crossed the 10 Mile at 8:47:50 a.m. with a time of 1:37:19. My little Heidi crossed the 20 Mile at 10:41:57 a.m. with a time of 3:31:26 and crossed the Finish Line at 12:07:38 p.m. with a time of 4 hours, 57 minutes and 7 seconds. Running 26 miles in less than 5 hours? I was exhausted!

I sent Heidi a congratulatory text and took a long nap. Ain’t technology grand?

Categories: Family, Uncategorized | Tags: marathon, Runner Tracker, running, Savannah, Savannah Marathon, tracking device | Leave a comment

Explain to me again why I have to bake cookies?

Posted on October 30, 2014 by queenbookworm

If the good Lord wanted us to bake cookies why did he give us Nabisco or Keebler or Famous Amos? Why should I have to try to do what they do so much better? Because my granddaughter had to bring 15 cookies to kindergarten for their Halloween party and she wanted to make the cookies.

She’s been baking with her dad for years so I figured she knew what she was doing. But try asking a 5 year old what temperature to set the oven or how much vanilla to use. Very cute blank stare. She wanted to make chocolate chocolate chip cookies. First we had to go to the grocery since the only flour in my pantry had little black things in it and the lid on the cocoa was rusted, no brown sugar or baking soda either.

I can tile the floors of an entire house, I can quilt, I can set up a camper (and empty the holding tanks). I can cook a seven-course meal, make the tablecloth and matching napkins, I can make the centerpiece and do the calligraphy on the invitations, I can make the name settings from pine cones and ribbons — but I can’t bake cookies. I don’t want to bake cookies. I hate to bake cookies. When my son was in second grade his teacher sent a note home asking me not to send baked goods to school for his class. I think she mentioned a chipped tooth.

Rebekah lost interest in the baking process after she licked the mixers and I was left with enough dough to make 5 dozen cookies. The only good thing was the parchment paper I found in my quilting room that I use for patterns. The cookies slid right off the baking sheet even the burned ones. So, we packed them up in a plastic container for tomorrow’s party. Then I was faced with cleaning up the bowls of leftover concrete-hard cookie dough, the flour and sugar all over the granite top counters and the recently washed floor, put away the ingredients I won’t need until another grandchild wants to make cookies (the youngest is 14 days old so the flour may have black things in it again).

Let’s face it … a bunch of kindergartners are going to enjoy the fruit of my blood, sweat and tears and, to be honest, they’d rather eat Oreos. So would I.

Categories: Family, Uncategorized | Tags: baking, cookies, Famous Amos, Keebler, kindergartners, Nabisco, Oreos | Leave a comment

Road Trip – Second Stop Nashville!

Posted on October 26, 2014 by queenbookworm

We drove 250 miles northwest from Atlanta to Nashville, Tennessee to visit our brother & his family in Thompsons Station.

Our first adventure took us to Leipers Fork where country celebrities are often sighted pickin’ and grinin’ at Puckett’s Grocery or with their families at the weekly outdoor movies.

Along the charming main street of Leipers Fork

Behind the old jail where weekly movies are shown outdoors

Leipers Fork

We were talking about the Natchez Trace at breakfast the next day so decided to go exploring along the Parkway and end up at the legendary Loveless Cafe for lunch. They make 7,000 biscuits a day. I think our table ate half of them with the blackberry jam.

First taste of a fried green tomato

My adorable family at Loveless Cafe

So, the following day we went to explore downtown Franklin, TN. I am a Civil War buff and was anxious to visit the historical sites from the Battle of Franklin, a major disaster for the Confederate Army. We didn’t have time during this visit, but I’ll be back.

On this visit to Franklin we started with breakfast at Meridee’s, a local institution, and took a walking tour of Franklin. The 150th anniversary of the Battle of Franklin will be commemorated this year.

Meridee’s Restaurant – a Franklin, TN icon

Downtown Franklin

Commemorating the 150th anniversary of the Battle of Franklin – go to Franklin150.com

This area of Tennessee is steeped in Civil War history and southern traditions and charm. Franklin also has many haunted establishments associated with the war between the states. Can’t wait to return and spend more time exploring – next time.