Posts Tagged With: spoiled cats

Stumbling, Bumbling & Feeding the Cat

Daily Prompt – Just Another Day:  Our days our organized around numerous small actions we repeat over and over. What’s your favorite daily ritual?

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Dusty is a 20-year old calico cat.  She’s mean, obnoxious and her meowing sounds like the screams of an old lady in pain.  I’m scared to death of her.  She’s blind, can’t hear very well and is crippled with arthritis.  She loves me.  I can only feed her small amounts at a time or she vomits.  When I hear those retching sounds I run to carry her outside but seldom make it in time.  Then it’s my turn to retch.

Dusty and I have a morning ritual that I have come to enjoy.  She wakes me with an old lady scream between 4:30 – 5:30 a.m.  I stumble into the kitchen and prepare her plate of food that I set out on the lanai where her litter box is kept.  This accomplishes three things – she eats, she poops and I can check the weather.

I then bumble around making coffee and cleaning up the kitchen until she comes back inside and limps down the hallway to stand next to my bed.  I arrange her quilt on top of my bedding and gingerly (she is not de-clawed and I have the scars to prove it) pick her up by the scruff of her neck and place her on her very own hand-made quilt.  Until a few months ago I have never allowed an animal in my bed.  (Well … I mean … you know).  She settles down for a little nap because she’s only had 14 hours of sleep.

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I plump up my pillows, carefully crawl in bed next to Dusty with my coffee, my iPhone and my computer and we settle down for an hour or so of pleasant social media mindlessness.  But, God forbid I move. There’s that old lady scream again — mine.

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Categories: Daily Prompt, Family, Life, Retirement, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , | 2 Comments

The Slut and the Misogynist – A Conversation

Writing 101:  Daily Prompts & Twists. Today’s Prompt: Write a post based on the contrast between two things — whether people, objects, emotions, places, or something else.

“You disgust me.  You lie on his lap and rub your cheek against his chest and let him caress you just so you can get what you want.”

“What’s wrong with that?  I like to be loved and stroked.  I give him what he needs and he gives me what I want.”

“Well, he grabbed me by the back of my neck and threw me outside so I had to sleep on the patio last night.  I looked in the window and saw you pawing all over him while he fed you from his plate and stroked your body.”

I don’t know why you’ve got your whiskers in a twist.  I love to be loved and petted.  You’re just mean.  You puked on his bathmat and he stepped in it and  you used his shower as a litter box.  I don’t know what kind of statement you were trying to make but you’re not going to get home cooked chicken and salmon morsels with that attitude. You need to learn to be sweet if you want love and affection.”

“Who said anything about love and affection?  I want to be treated with respect.  I want to be fed on time, have a clean litterbox and I want to have my ears scratched when it pleases me.  I don’t want to lower myself to your standards, rubbing against his legs and purring.  I think when they removed your claws, they removed your brain … you’re such a slut.”

“Why don’t you shut up? Go choke on a hairball and leave me alone.”

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Categories: Family, Humor, Life | Tags: , , , | 6 Comments

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