An Offer I Couldn’t (and didn’t) Refuse

 

Daily Prompt – Race the Clock:  Here’s the title of your post: “An Offer I Couldn’t Refuse.” Set a timer for ten minutes, and write it. Go!

“Hey, Mom!  Whatcha’ doing this weekend?”

“Nothing special.  What’s up?”

“Well, you know that seminar in Washington, DC I’m speaking at?  I just found out that I have the suite they booked for me through the entire weekend and my last talk is Friday morning, so why don’t you hop on a plane and come play with me?”

Are you kidding?  I was packed, had my boarding pass printed out, my credit cards burning a hole in my pocket and was half-way to the airport before my daughter could say goodbye.

I had never been to Washington DC and I knew that with Heidi I would get to see and do everything I wanted.

United States Capitol Building

United States Capitol Building

I arrived on Friday morning and as soon as I threw my suitcase on the bed in her beautiful hotel room, we were off!  First we hopped on the metro for Georgetown.  As we rode the escalator up to the street, her little nose began twitching as she sniffed the air.  “I smell Lush”.  Sure enough, there was a Lush store on the first block and we spent our first few minutes sight-seeing buying bath bombs and salts.  We spent the rest of the afternoon wandering around, stopped for drinks at cute outdoor cafes several times and staggered back to the hotel for an early bedtime.

Early Saturday morning we jumped on a tour bus and did all the touristy things:  Ford Theatre and the Lincoln Museum, Arlington Cemetery, raising the flag at Iwo Jima, saw all the monuments, Lincoln Center, etc. We ate and drank our way around the city.  Sunday was the Smithsonian.  I think we made it through only five of the museums, the capitol, the White House because at 5:30 p.m. we met our tour guide for an night-time walking tour of the memorial monuments.

Washington Memorial and Reflecting Pond

Washington Memorial and Reflecting Pond

The monuments are spectacular during the day but at night they are magnificent.  The Viet Nam Wall, WWII, Jefferson and Lincoln Memorials, and the Korean War Memorial.  By the time we finished the tour, my little 4 foot 10 inch daughter was walking behind me pushing my butt up the hills. We arrived back at the hotel too tired for dinner, had a vodka tonic and slept like babes.

Lincoln Memorial

Lincoln Memorial

Monday morning we rode the metro and took a bus out to Mount Vernon, George Washington’s estate.  We took a walking tour through the house and grounds and were duly impressed imagining our country’s first president entertaining there.  Then back to the hotel to take a taxi to the airport and home.

Korean War Memorial

Korean War Memorial

Time’s up!

(I only had 10 minutes to write this, but I’m taking a few more minutes to insert some pix.  So, sue me.)

 

 

 

Categories: Family, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , | 5 Comments

Morton’s Fork

Daily PromptIf you had to choose between being able to write a blog (but not read others’) and being able to read others’ blogs (but not write your own), which would you pick? Why?

This past week I have looked through the windows of homes in Turkey and Greece; visited the Churchill Museum in London, gone kayaking in Austrailia and mountain biking in New Zealand.  I have learned about the pain and humiliation of bipolar disorders and about the inside of mental hospitals.  I know where to get a tattoo in Ireland.  I saw a master quilter finish an antique quilt and turn it into a work of art.  If my hands are ever bound with duct tape, I know how to free myself and I know what to pack to survive a zombie apocalypse. I’ve visited museums throughout Italy and gone diving with sharks.  I’ve acquired some wonderful recipes and learned how to make my lips plumper.

zombieI don’t want to choose between writing a blog and reading the offerings of other bloggers, but if the threat was dire enough, I would choose to continue reading blogs from around the world; going, doing, seeing things I may never experience otherwise.

However, now that I know what to pack, nothing short of a zombie apocalypse will keep me from writing my blog, too.

Categories: Humor, Uncategorized | Tags: , , | 3 Comments

Do or Die

Daily Prompt: You have three hundred words to justify the existence of your favorite person, place, or thing. Failure to convince will result in it vanishing without a trace. Go!

It is my refuge, my office, my sanctuary, my sanity.  Parked in my driveway or in a grove of oak trees next to a river, it is my younger years denied, the dolls and toys I never had, and the places I never experienced.  It is my first and second childhood.   I need only my computer, my books, my phone, some food, a couple of bottles of red wine and a full tank of gas.  Then I hook up my little Casita camper and go exploring for a safe place to reflect, refresh and rejuvenate my spirit.  My camper provides the freedom I crave to discover myself in new sights and sounds, to meet people and explore places I’ve spent a lifetime bypassing.

When I am ready to return to my beloveds, I am calm and eager to join them in our daily real world adventures.

Casita

cropped-camper.jpg

 

Categories: Camping, Family, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: , , | 3 Comments

I’m the Champ! I Can Spell I-N-D-I-A-N

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Teacher’s Pet.”

I don’t know if I’m compulsive or obsessive about reading.  If I don’t have a book or my Kindle with me  I don’t know what to do with my eyes so I will read whatever is at hand — medicine bottles, junk mail, anatomy posters in the doctor’s office, eye charts, candy wrappers, receipts and grocery lists from the bottom of my purse, the outside covers of books other people are reading,  and even toilet paper wrappers (don’t ask).

I loved words from the time I was 3 or 4 years old.  I knew that the letters on the page were sounds and that the sounds made words and the words made stories.  I “read” my books by looking at the pictures then looking at each individual word and, although I didn’t know what the word said, when I got to the last word I knew it was time to turn the page.  I never had anyone read to me so I read to myself and to my sister.

classroom

We were innocent in the mid-1950’s. We went to kindergarten to learn to interact socially, to take directions from teachers and to be comfortable in a classroom environment.  There was no such thing as pre-school. We didn’t learn our ABCs, numbers or anything else.  Unlike today when it seems that my grandchildren must know how to parse a sentence, conjugate verbs, speak a second language, read a Dostoevsky novel, play a musical instrument and know basic geometry before they graduate from kindergarten.  We were truly blessed to be allowed to be children.  But, I still couldn’t read.

First grade taught me the alphabet and phonics.  Oh joy!  I learned how to sound out words with the Dick and Jane series of books.  Second grade we were allowed to use the school library and take books home.

But, third grade was the best year ever.  I was in a new school and Mrs. Bailey let us read whatever we wanted after lunch and we had spelling bees every day!  I soon discovered that most of the other kids didn’t know how to sound out words and I was quickly recognized as the best speller in the class.  By winning the classroom spelling bee I got to represent Mrs. Bailey’s class in the school’s third grade spelling bee.

spell-clipart-yTo7pr8TE

The competition was held in the library and I seem to remember there were 6 or 8 of us in the spelling bee. I was so proud and scared.  I had no problem with words like music, yellow, happy, kitten, kitchen, orange but then I found myself one of the two finalists.  The word was “Indian”.  I didn’t know whether to wet my pants or cry.  I cried.  This was the longest word in the spelling bee; three syllables.  Not fair!

The other kid couldn’t spell it.  The librarian asked me why I was crying so I told her that the word was too long.  By then my nose was running and I had the “snubbies”; you know, when you cry so hard your breath hitches?  God bless Mrs. Bailey.  She handed me a tissue and whispered, “Jodi, just sound it out.”  I did and I spelled the longest word in my world.

That’s also the year Mrs. Bailey taught us how to write in cursive, my second favorite thing next to reading.

Categories: Humor, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , | Leave a comment

No More S’mores! (a 5-year old’s first camping adventure)

Roasting marshmallows over a campfire, then placing the blackened goo on a piece of chocolate between two graham crackers; the hot marshmallow melting the chocolate … the iconic image of camping with kids.  We couldn’t wait to make them with Rebekah, our 5-year old granddaughter on her first ever overnight camping trip.  She assured us she loves s’mores … well, except for the marshmallows … maybe hold the graham crackers …. o.k. …  just give her the damn chocolate!

We camped at Koreshan Historic Site State Park in Estero, Florida between Fort Myers and Naples on Florida’s west coast.

Categories: Camping, Family, Life, Retirement, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Boring Breakfast Meetings and A Famous Indian

As a department manager I was required to attend the monthly managers’ breakfast meetings with the Director and the other three managers.  The Director was a pompous, bombastic, argumentative, resentful misogynist who delighted in excluding me whenever he could from  the managers’ all boys club.  I had been promoted by his predecessor and since I had outstanding evaluations, there was nothing he could do about me.

These breakfasts were such an incredible waste of my time 1) because the “guys” all tried to outdo each other in caloric intake, ordering huge greasy, disgusting breakfast specials while I ate an egg and fruit and drank endless cups of coffee prompting comments about my figure vs theirs; 2) because we very seldom discussed organization business but I had to listen ad nauseum to their military and sports stories; and, breakfasts3) as a woman, they expected me to keep notes which I refused to do.  Insulting, demeaning, antagonistic behaviors …  I spent each  breakfast meeting on edge, deflecting every insult with a pithy comeback or a witty comment while trying to avoid bloodshed.  I would gladly have ripped the director’s head off and bludgeoned the other two with it.  Most of the females working in the organization would have testified that it was justifiable homicide.

 

During one of these (endless) meetings, the “boys” were discussing famous Marines and one of them said, “What about Ira whats-his-name?”  I said, “Do you mean Ira Hayes?”  Four pairs of astonished eyes swiveled to me and the original questioner said, “Bet you guys don’t know what he did.”  “Sure,” I said. “He was the Native American Marine who helped raise the flag over Iwo Jima; was honored as one of the five heroes and eventually died in a gutter from alcohol poisoning.”  I could actually see their mouths drop open …

Thank you Johnny Cash for recording “The Ballad of Ira Hayes”.  I’ll learn my lessons wherever I find them.

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“The Ballad Of Ira Hayes”

Ira Hayes,
Ira Hayes
Gather round me people there’s a story I would tell
About a brave young Indian you should remember well
From the land of the Pima Indian
A proud and noble band
Who farmed the Phoenix valley in Arizona land
Down the ditches for a thousand years
The water grew Ira’s peoples’ crops
‘Till the white man stole the water rights
And the sparklin’ water stopped
Now Ira’s folks were hungry
And their land grew crops of weeds
When war came, Ira volunteered
And forgot the white man’s greed
There they battled up Iwo Jima’s hill,
Two hundred and fifty men
But only twenty-seven lived to walk back down again
And when the fight was over
And when Old Glory raised
Among the men who held it high
Was the Indian, Ira HayesIra returned a hero
Celebrated through the land
He was wined and speeched and honored;
Everybody shook his handBut he was just a Pima Indian
No water, no crops, no chance
At home nobody cared what Ira’d done
And when did the Indians danceThen Ira started drinkin’ hard;
Jail was often his home
They’d let him raise the flag and lower it
like you’d throw a dog a bone!

He died drunk one mornin’
Alone in the land he fought to save
Two inches of water in a lonely ditch
Was a grave for Ira Hayes

[CHORUS:]
Call him drunken Ira Hayes
He won’t answer anymore
Not the whiskey drinkin’ Indian
Nor the Marine that went to war

Yeah, call him drunken Ira Hayes
But his land is just as dry
And his ghost is lyin’ thirsty
In the ditch where Ira died

 

 

Categories: Life, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Bird Song and Carillon Bells on Easter Morning

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Re-springing Your Step.”

I  hooked up my Casita travel trailer when I got sick of the cold and snow at my vacation cottage in Michigan last April and waved goodbye to my husband.  I hit the road without any thought other than heading south and getting warm.

Although I spent some time berating myself for being pig-headed, stubborn and maybe a little selfish and careless, I didn’t beat myself up for too long because travel energizes me and makes me happy.  I was feeling mighty fine until I got to northern Florida and realized I was too tired to safely drive any further and I was still four hours away from my home, my children and granddaughter.

I had to camp by myself for the first time ever and it was Easter Eve.  I found a camp site  at the Stephen Foster Memorial State Park and prepared myself for a drizzly kind of  night alone.  Since I’d been flying by the seat of my pants and hadn’t stocked the camper, I dined on bagged popcorn and a bottle of Cabernet.   I was feeling a little sorry for myself, but had a good night’s sleep … the Cabernet, you think?

I woke at daybreak to the sound of bells.  When I stepped outside I found the drizzle had become a light mist blurring  the towering pines and oaks that dwarfed me.  The Spanish moss hung from the trees like an old woman’s prayer shawl and the bells became music welcoming Easter morning.  I made a quick  cup of coffee and sat enchanted on the wet picnic table bench.

Stephen Foster State Park, Carillon Tower

Stephen Foster State Park, Carillon Tower

The carillon tower was playing hymns and Stephen Foster’s  famous melodies.  As the day brightened and the mist dissolved, the birds joined the carillon and I felt as if I was sitting in a cathedral and the choir was singing just for me.  I thought my heart would break with the beauty. I felt alive and energized, healthy in body and spirit. So, I said a prayer of gratitude and thanksgiving and sent silent wishes to my loved ones for a wonderful, meaningful Easter day.

Way Down Upon the Suwannee River

Way Down Upon the Suwannee River

A carillon is a musical instrument consisting of at least 23 cast bronze bells that are precisely tuned and arranged in chromatic progression so that music in any key can be played. Unlike other types of bells, carillon bells are fixed in a frame—the bells do not move.

Categories: Camping, Family, Life, Travel, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | 7 Comments

See ‘Ya Later Alligator!

Blogging 101, Assignment 9 – Engaged Posting

I was reading “Weird Thoughts” on The Creek, a witty blog by a man who lives on a creek with his dogs.  His weird thoughts included wondering what would happen if his eyeball popped out while he was rubbing his eye and he put it back in sideways, would he lose his balance?  If he put it in backwards would he see the inside of his head? Pure silliness which is right up my alley and got me thinking about my own weird thoughts.

I live in Florida where everyone knows that there is an alligator living in every body of water.  Floridians are taught that although alligators can run up to 35 mph on land, they cannot make right-hand (90 degree) turns, so if you are ever being chased by an alligator, simply make a 90 degree turn.

alligator-walking-02

Seriously?

Who in the world is going to remember to make a 90 degree turn when a prehistoric beast is charging up their backside? Does it mean that if you make three 90 degree turns you’ll come up  behind the monster and you’ll be safe if you stay in back of him?  Can he run in a big circle and come up behind you?  Who tested the 90 degree theory?

I’ve always imagined I would get behind a tree figuring by the time he maneuvers around the tree, I would have time to make several 90 degree turns right the hell out of there.  Of course this whole conversation is moot since I’d drop dead from fright and my eyeballs would probably pop out.

Can you beat that weird thought?

alligator purse

 Q: How many arms has an alligator got?
A: Depends how far he’s gotten with eating his dinner!

Q: Why don’t alligators like fast food?
A: Because they can’t catch it!

Q: What do you get if you cross a alligator with a flower?
A: I don’t know, but I’m not going to smell it!

Categories: Humor | Tags: , , | 11 Comments

I’m Supposed To Be Retired So Why Am I So Busy?

Once again I am running behind on my Blogging 101 assignments.  I spent three hours catching up yesterday and can’t figure out how I’m behind already.

day10

Got up this morning and made the coffee

Fed the cat

Fed the cat

Went for a 2-mile walk along the Peace River

Went for a 2-mile walk along the Peace River

Had coffee with my husband

Had coffee with my husband

Husband & I planned the rest of our day

Reviewed schedules & to-do lists with husband

Made breakfast & cleaned the kitchen

Made breakfast & cleaned the kitchen

Got my hair cut

Got my hair cut

Paid the bills

Paid the bills

Worked on customer quilts on my long arm machine

Completed a customer’s quilt on my long arm machine

Cocktail hour(s)

Cocktail hour(s)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

No pix of my visit to the doctor, preparing dinner and cleaning the kitchen (again), phone calls with quilting customers, kids & other business.  But I did spend time on Blogging 101, making comments and I worked on my header photos, got my Blogging 101 badge correctly posted and other odds & ends.  Oh, I also watched a couple of past episodes of “Game of Thrones”.

As  Lewis Carroll said, “The hurrier I go, the behinder I get.” Geez, I know how that poor White Rabbit felt!

rabbit

Categories: Humor, Life, Retirement, Uncategorized | Tags: , | 5 Comments

Welcome to My Neighborhood

Blogging University 101, Assignment 8:  Get out your calling cards, and leave comments on at least four blogs that you’ve never commented on before.

standing on head2Well, how easy is this assignment?  I could do it all day standing on my head.  There are hundreds of interesting blogs by people I would love to invite over for cocktails and a chat.  Unfortunately, I have a gazillion things on my agenda today so I was a good girl and limited myself to only four new comments as prescribed by the assignment.

I read a charming post by Ace who seems to be gentleman describing how to treat a lady.  How’s that for unusual in this modern world?  The daily writing and photography of Marilyn Armstrong (Serendipity – Searching for Intelligent Life on Earth)  is always delightful and thought provoking.  Today’s blog was about struggling with the realities of retirement. Stuff My Dog Taught Me (and stuff I’m figuring out on my own),  is always good for a smile with a humorous twist on real life situations. Then there’s The Creek, a slightly off kilter, quirky look at life while living on a creek with a couple of dogs. OK, OK – one more.  For quilters, there’s Tim Latimer’s blog just in case you want to feel totally inadequate, I mean totally motivated.

There appears to be something for everyone and WordPress Reader makes it so easy to stay in touch. I always enjoy meeting new people … make a comment so we can get to know each other, neighbor.

Categories: Humor, Life, Uncategorized | Tags: , , , , | 4 Comments

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